POOR HILDEGARD COCKROACH

In my last post I spoke of my intense dislike of cockroaches and blogger Shaw Kenawe shared a poem she created in hopes that she could change my attitude:

 HILDEGARD COCKROACH

Hildegard Cockroach lives in the city
And lives a life that's not very pretty.
She spends her days down in the drain
Of a smelly old sink. It's really a pain.

At night she crawls onto a sticky plate
or a stain of gravy that's second rate.
And if she's lucky, she's sometimes able
to feast on leftover food on the table.

"Nobody likes me," Hildegard thought,
"because of the life I lead, and it ought
not to influence how the feel.
It isn't my fault I must scrounge for a meal.

They jump when they see me, they run and yell.
They reach for the bug spray, and I can tell
how they hate me. But what did I do?
Just munched on a moldy old crumb or two.
O, it's true. The life of a cockroach is very hard,"
sighed the sad little cockroach, Hildegard.

It is a very nice poem and I appreciate her efforts.  Here is my response.

POOR HILDEGARD COCKROACH

I’m almost persuaded.

She near touched my soul.

As the many sad hardships

Of her bug life she told.

Poor Hildegard Cockroach

A cockroach life is no crystal stair

And Hildy certainly does have a story to tell.

She’s a real sob sister

And a pitiful victim as well.

Poor Hildegard Cockroach

First she complains she must scrounge for her food.

Oh. she whines about every little this and little that.

“Nobody likes me; everybody hates me.”

The wailing and  moaning Hildy has down pat.

Poor Hildegard Cockroach

Tom writes in the comments, loving those bugs still.

How could he? One jumped on his head!

And Jeny write of bugs in her mouth!

Blaaah—I want all Hildys DEAD!

Gross Hildegard Cockroach

Not one to give up in having his say,

Tom maintains there’s good in all bugs—even Hildy, by the way.

So, quite disdainfully,  and sure I am right, I googled cockroaches today.

6 million nasty hits--but wait--2 were good

 What can I say!

AH Hildegard Cockroach!

It seems in September of 2010

The Docs found cockroaches to be of some use

Fighting infections they searched for new antibiotics and found,

if you please, hot diggidy,  they could use cockroach brain juice!!!

Valuable Hildegard Cockroach

I’ll donate to science; I’m up for that.

I’ll kill ‘em and keep the carcasses all 

In a trash bag out of my sight

Till the bug hearsh comes to call.

Recycled Hildegard Cockroach

 Do we jump when we see her?

 Do we reach for the bug spray?

Oh yeah, you betcha! Without delay!

Disgusting Hildegard Cockroach

I’ve searched my heart in iambic pentameter* verse         *sort of

Should we cut her a break? Does she deserve her fate?

Yeah, cause she’s icky, she’s yucky, she carries disease.

Stomp on her; smash her;  run her down. Hate! Hate! Hate!

Goodby  Hildegard Cockroach

Poor Hildegard Cockroach

YEECH SOME BUGS DESERVE THE DEATH PENALTY

Tom and I agree on most things--politics for instance. We both are progressive, but not slavishly Democrat.  We have voted for a Republican before (rarely) and are supporting a Green candidate this election cycle. It is truly about the issues and the person.

We also agree on movies--musicals, movies with a message (or sappy movies as Jeny calls them), quality cartoons, like Up, movies with a historical theme.

We both like sports, especially basketball and soccer. Tom loves football; I love tennis. We are CRAZY for the Tar Heels, hate Duke, enjoy USC and are interested in Clemson. We follow the NBA.

Tom and I like the same food--basically all food, except that I don't like beets. I can't stand beets. 
 



                                                 
  
                                                         Yuck to beets.

There are some things we do not agree on, but that would be the subject of a different post.

Well, it is sort of, in a way, relevant to this one.  Tom and I absolutely agree about the sanctity of life, about the worth and dignity of every person and the interdependent web of all existence. In some cases that means the same thing to both of us.  We do not believe in the death penalty.  We do not hunt for sport. We do not believe in using fur or exotic animal skins for designer accessories--fancy fur coats, leopard Prada handbags, alligator shoes, meat dresses.

 
Tom and I also agree that we should not destroy animals or insects that invade our home.  Though their natural habitat is outside--in the yard, forest, or garbage or whatever/where-ever, on occasion a creature will come into our house uninvited.  There have been many times when the visitor has been drug in by the cat--as they say,  ungrammatically. Muck is the hunter one of our two cats, who likes to bring her prey in through the cat window, usually still alive. She brings in crickets, grasshoppers, baby rabbits, birds, snakes, frogs, mice. Other creatures wander in on their own--ladybugs, spiders, bees. We always try to get the creature back outside, by picking it up, which works for ladybugs, spiders, even snakes sometimes. We shoo them out through broadly open doors.  That works for birds, rabbits and bees. If we can put a container over the top of them and carry them out, the crickets, grasshoppers and frogs make it outside.  Even the mouse is treated humanely.  We use the type of trap that draws him inside an enclosure with peanut butter bait, slams the door behind and allows us to transport him outside and release him far far away from the house, far away. We respect the sanctity of all creatures, including insects.

........except one.........

When I see a COCKROACH, I step on him. I step on him with a vengeance.  I grind him into pieces. I run him down.   I have no mercy. I am glad he is dead.  If I see one outside, sometimes I kill him as a preventative measure.  That is one cockroach of the 200,000,000,000 in the world that will not be coming into my house. 

Cockroaches abound in South Carolina.  It is hot and damp, which makes an ideal breeding ground for them.  Euphemistically we call them Palmetto bugs.  And, in fact,  there is a slight difference between the two.  Palmetto bug are larger and they can fly!

 
Tom argues that we should treat them as we do other 
 creatures, that they should be carried outside and set free to live their cockroach lives. This is one thing that we have argued about pretty consistently.  I don't think they deserve to live and the thought of picking one up is so revoltingly repulsive that I can taste the bile in my mouth at the thought.  I try to educate Tom about cockroach facts. They spread filth; they cause allergies, including asthma. He maintains that is all Orkin propaganda.

 Recently, I was at the computer in our home office.  He was in the den watching the news on notFox. I heard him   say, rather loudly, "Woooow."  Then he said "Umph."  In a minute he remarked, in a peculiar voice, "The oddest thing just happened!  A huge cockroach just landed on my head. When I tried to knock it off, it kinda got tangled in my hair."  I was incapable of a response.

I do not anticipate that Tom will, upon sighting the next cockroach, be carrying it outside to continue its cockroach life.  In my opinion, some bugs deserve the death penalty.  I wonder if  Tom now agrees.